For the record, I hate panic attacks. Not sure I know of anyone who loves them. But, I just wanted to make it clear my feelings on the topic. I hate ‘em.
About 7 years ago I had them quite often. Very intense and soon became dibilitating. I ended up admitting myself to a hospital for help. At the time the attacks were just the tip of the iceberg in regards to what was going on inside me. Soon with meds and therapy they were under control and I found balance in my life.
I have been off my anxiety meds for about 3-4 years now. All has been good. Then about a month or so ago they started coming on. Luckily I know enough about my body and the experience of an attack that I can feel it coming on and am able to take actions to avoid a full attack. It’s been tough though and many times I feel they threaten my ability to live a full life. In actuality, they really can. Since they come from nowhere most of the time, I am caught off guard and have to do what I can to handle them. Sometimes the after-affect (lingering panic under the surface) can stick around for hours. It’s frustrating.
I know much of what I’m going through right now is related to the immense amount of life-altering changes I’ve been through in the last couple months, as well as the last couple years. It makes sense that someone with a history of panic attacks might suffer from them again at this pinnacle life-shift. I understand it. I also understand that there might be some stuff churning beneath the surface during this time that I need to deal with. My body is telling me there is stress and I need to deal with it. I get it.
I still hate em though.
